I think that many of us learned to be good "helicopter" parents because we had great "helicopter" parents; or, we became good "helicopter" parents because ours were just the opposite. My mom let me make my own mistakes, pass up great opportunities, and, she allowed me to make a fool of myself on a daily basis! Thanks, mom! I really mean it! You let me choose! It's not your fault that I chose "stupid!"
I think there is gentle and loving guidance and then there is "meddling." I want my kids to have the best opportunities to live a great life. So, I meddled when they were under my control, and the habit became so addictive, I found that I could not stop. It never occurred to me that maybe my idea of a great life and their idea of a great life might be 180 degrees apart.
It took a move to another state for me to realize that I needed to stop. Yes, I am going through "meddling" withdrawals and learning how to let go. It's not easy, but thanks to great support from my new friends, as well as, my old friends, the kids are muddling their way through it all, and living to tell about it!
So, to my beloved children, I love you and I am here for you....but you are on your own now!
4 comments:
You are a good and wise mom. I think it is key to realize that what we want for our kids may not be what they want for themselves.
I'll bet everyone of them know exactly what you would say about any given situation, even if you are not there to say it.
Love it!
Well done on letting go...it's a hard one to do.
Post a Comment